Create something sweet for your kiddos to give their friends!

Boundaries - tricky little things, aren’t they? Especially when it comes to loved ones, be it a family member or a close friend. Yet they’re so, so necessary. Boundaries are necessary to set at home with our spouses/partners and children; boundaries are necessary to set with our parents and siblings; boundaries are necessary to set with our oldest and dearest friends; and boundaries are necessary to set in the workplace, with clients, employees, co-workers, and peers. I’m the very definition of people pleaser (high achievers often are), and I’ve found setting boundaries and asking for what I need (two things that work hand-in-hand a lot) incredibly difficult. I would even say I’m terrible at it. I think we’ve been conditioned by society to believe (especially as women) that asking for what we want and/or need is a burden, and most likely we’ll get pushback. So we don’t ask - and we don’t set boundaries. Yet without boundaries, we’ll get steamrolled. Example: I’ve spent the past ten years a slave to my phone, always feeling I’ve had to answer calls, texts, and emails from clients within the hour (that’s the problem with everyone being so connected these days - a quick response is expected). How stupid. I told my therapist just the other day, “I’ve taken several trips since starting my company, but I haven’t had a single mental vacation. I’m always on, always connected.” How sad is that? I’ve long dealt with high functioning anxiety (simply put: I seem fine to those around me, and I’m extremely productive, but internally? I’m a hot mess), and a lack of healthy boundaries has only amplified that. I’ve said “yes” far too many times, and “no” not nearly enough. I’ve kept from asserting myself and my needs, fearing I’d inconvenience others in doing so. I’ve run myself ragged. And I doubt, very highly, I’m the only one in this state - any of this sound familiar? I can tell you with complete confidence this line of thinking, this way of life has worn on me physically, mentally, and emotionally. It’s not at all sustainable. Enough’s enough, amiright? My therapist recently tasked me with setting some healthy boundaries.. Was it a tall order? Yep. But man - it’s completely changed the game for me. Consider me a boundary junkie. An expert, of sorts (can I call myself that after a few short months? Cause I’m going to…). I’ve spent a lot of time reading up on setting boundaries, especially when it comes to doing so with those I’m closest to (because, let’s face it - that sucks), and I feel like I’ve cracked the code, in some respects. I’ve found a few key ways to do so that lessen the blow, so to say. I now have a boundary checklist, and I tick off each of the following five ways to set healthy boundaries every time I find myself needing to create one: Set them early. You know the saying: “you can’t teach an old dog new tricks.” To my point regarding us women being conditioned to believe that asking for what we need and/or want is a burden, this one’s tough - there’s a fear attached to setting a boundary, so we procrastinate when doing so. But if we don’t set that boundary right out the gate, it’s going to be tougher and tougher to get that person or entity to comply. That, and they’ll most likely be totally blindsided when we finally set it. Who can blame them? We’ve just spent days, weeks, months - even years - letting them think we’re good with something, when we’re really not… Logan and I have this conversation all the time. I’m the queen of internalizing issues and bringing them up well after the fact (he just loves it). When I do, and try to set parameters (boundaries) to keep the issue from persisting, he ends up blindsided and asks why I didn’t bring it up sooner. It also takes him a minute to adjust. I get it! It all stems from a fear of upsetting or burdening him. BUT, if you set a precedent from the start, your loved ones will always see that boundary as the way of things, and you’ll save yourself - and your loved ones - a lot of confusion and frustration. Be clear and concise so there’s no confusion. Speaking of confusion, spell it out so you don’t have any! Going back to that fear involved with setting boundaries - I tend to “ease my way in to setting a boundary,” afraid that I’ll come on too strong if I clearly outline things from the start, and upset whoever I’m setting the boundary with. But, in reality, being clear and concise will save both parties a lot of trouble. I feel like being clear and concise with a boundary is a lot like having a contract in place with a client. I love contracts, and I love them because they serve as a straightforward documentation of what both parties have agreed to. If ever there’s a question about the engagement, you simply check the contract! It outlines all conditions, and can keep disputes from getting messy. When you’re clear and concise about the boundaries you set, there’s never a question about where you stand, and it can actually save you and your loved ones from further issues down the line. Explain why this boundary is necessary and important to you. The topic of this post is setting boundaries with loved ones … Meaning, the people you’re setting boundaries with love you. If they love you (and I mean truly love you), your happiness will be important to them. If it’s not, show them the door. Explaining why a boundary is necessary and important to you may strengthen your case. If the person you’re setting the boundary with (and again, this is someone that loves you…) understands how that boundary might be good for you, they’re more likely to take it seriously and honor it. Pretty simple! Mean what you say. This one comes from my mom, and it’s in respect to my toddler, who’s pushing boundaries like crazy right now (which is a bit different than what we’re talking about here, but also similar in many respects…). Tonight, as I washed the dishes after dinner, I turned to find Olivia - face full of ketchup and mac and cheese - sliding across the kitchen island on her stomach. I promptly got on her, pulling her off the kitchen island and reminding her that wasn’t something we did. What did she do? She proceeded to get back up and do it again. And again. And again. Exhausting? Yes. Who wants to pull their kid off the kitchen island five times in a row? Yet it’s necessary, because not doing so will make Olivia think I’ll only go so far to enforce that rule or boundary. At some point, in her mind, I’ll give up and she can go back to doing it. I have to mean what I say. It’s no different when setting a boundary with a loved one. If you’ve established a new boundary, then let the person you’ve set that boundary with cross the line, they’re going to rightfully think they can cross the line again and again. Self-assertion is a scary but important thing. Stand strong in the parameters you’ve set for that boundary - mean what you say. Expect to be challenged (at least at first). Nerd alert: I’m the biggest Jurassic Park junkie. Like, literally counting down the days until the final Jurassic World film comes out, own every other movie and still stream them when they’re available on Netflix, and I very briefly considered getting one of the Jurassic Park branded Jeeps they have out. I’m a superfan. For those of you who haven’t seen it, the storyline in each of the movies largely revolves around the velociraptor - a carnivore both fierce and incredibly smart. In the very first movie (yes, this is a spoiler, but honestly, it came out almost 30 years ago, so my God, if this upsets you, I’m not sorry…), one of the park rangers talks about how the raptors regularly tested the fences, looking for weaknesses so they could escape. When we set boundaries, it’s not uncommon for those we set the boundaries with to “test the fences.” The more clear and concise we are, the less likely they are to test. BUT, it will probably happen. Hold firm - but understand that this may have something to do with them simply trying to further understand what those boundaries mean for them, and for their relationship with you. I’ve truly found that employing each of these tactics has helped immensely - and made the boundary setting process much less stressful and awkward, and much more empowering and gratifying. So, onward, you boundary setting goddess. Show ‘em how it’s done and take care of yourself!

I'm starting this blog at the worst possible time. Let me explain… I’m a mother of two (what a life change that’s been), the owner of a small, boutique publicity firm specializing in work with artists, events, and anything else music-related… I’m getting married on November 24th (yep, that’s almost exactly two months away. Am I ready? Nope.), and there are about 1,792 changes and upgrades I’d like to make in my house. Do I have the time to be starting a blog? Absolutely not. (On a completely unrelated note - if anyone knows where I can find, say, 5 extra hours in every day, let me know…). All of that said, the want to start chronicling my life’s journey in the form of a blog has become a need that I can no longer ignore. Let me explain. When you’re a child, you’re repeatedly asked what you’d like to be when you grow up. You spend your elementary years flirting what different career ideas, taking personality and aptitude tests that the school systems insist on putting you through, and honing in on your “talents” (because we all have them - whether your talents have been properly identified and acknowledged is a completely different story). One of the greatest “misses” in my life has been my talent for writing. As a child, teenager, and young adult - writing is for papers. Especially in my day in age. As a 35-year old, the introduction of the internet is a far distant memory - one that’s been swallowed by a million and one texts, instant messages, DM’s, etc. College ruled paper has been replaced by laptops and tablets. Who really writes anymore? But when I look back, I realize something: writing has always been one of my greatest creative outlets, and something I’ve consistently excelled at. It’s the perfect marriage of release and talent. SO, here I go. Off to write, share, and repeat. I’m not sure what I have to say is valuable. In fact, putting my thoughts in a place accessible makes my palms sweat. But I see the work I could do here as potentially healing for myself and helpful for others (which, believe it or not, I care a whole hell of a lot about) - all while utilizing some of my greatest strengths. How could I not? Why Always Fall? I mean, I love fall (consider me your favorite basic - down to the Ugg boots, leggings, oversized sweater, and Starbucks Pumpkin Spice Latte) - so that’s a plus. And I think the name sounds cool. But what I’m really out to find - and what I hope to help others find (especially you mama’s with a job outside of being mama, because we all know that’s a full time job in and of itself) is balance - something I’m currently failing miserably at. Balance between what? It could be something as huge as work-life balance, or something a bit more micro like balancing the creation of a colorful Play-Doh dessert platter (spearheaded and masterminded by your little) and the creation of an actual, semi-edible dinner. Because, in the end, we all want a life we can fall in love with - day after day. I’ve decided the key to achieving that is balance. Nothing is ever going to be perfect, and things often won’t go as planned. But if we can strike a balance in our lives, perhaps we can learn to always fall . If this sounds like something you’re also needing in life, join me! Consider this my open book: I’ll share my favorite recipes, how I got my toddler to stop hitting about 90% of the time, lessons I’ve taken from owning my business, and why I fired the guy that I originally hired to put up the board and batten in my hall - and did it my own damn self (and how!).

I. Love. Joanna. Gaines. Call me incredibly basic – I’m good with that! I think everything she does, eats, breaths is gold, and I strive to be like her in some way (yes, I channeled here when we built our house. Think lots of white subway tile and shiplap…). That said, I wait with bated breath for her seasonal items to release, and her fall line has proved worth the wait! Now, a few of these items are in their regular standing inventory. But I mean – we’re all going to need a platter for Thanksgiving, amiright?! You’re going to learn as you continue following this blog (and I REALLY hope you do) that I’m a bit of a farmhouse decor snob. I think there are a lot of products that try way too hard to be cute farmhouse decor (I’ve got my eye on you, white milk jug vases with a black ‘farmhouse’ stamp across you). I’m not interested in a sign with rub marks every three inches because whoever produced it was trying to make it look weathered. Not my thing. Your thing? Love that for you. But because I’m a girl of simple taste, I tend towards the more understated farmhouse finds… And hear me now: it’s not “vintage” unless it’s REALLY vintage. Now that we’ve gotten that out of the way, one of the things I love about some of the Hearth and Hand products this fall is they don’t scream fall… Let’s call them a nod to fall, really. They’re products that, honestly, you can put up as early as August and leave up until you pull out the Christmas decorations (that Joanna Gaines sure is smart…). I don’t need my entire house to be fall colors. What I need is more of a feeling… A cozy sort of groundedness, if you will. What gets you that? Touches of burnt orange and gold, sure, but also sitting in front of a fire with a big knit blanket draped across your lap while sipping hot coffee… Every product featured below will help create that feel. So find the items you love and turn your home into the perfect fall retreat! PRODUCTS 35oz Harvest Spice 5-Wick Speckled Ceramic Fall Candle - Hearth & Hand™ with Magnolia – who doesn't love a good fall candle? Tell me a jar candle doesn't give you all the fall feels, and I'll call you a liar... 94oz Stoneware Pumpkin Serving Dish - Threshold™ – I've only recently hopped on the soup train, but man have I ever. I love soup. And what's better on a brisk fall day than a cup of hot soup? I'll tell you what - a cup of hot soup, served from this pumpkin shaped soup tureen. 38" Faux Rusted Croton Plant Stem - Hearth & Hand™ with Magnolia – I've found that when it comes to fall decorating, I appreciate the more muted decor (as if you couldn't take that from the photo collage). I love that this stem doesn't scream fall, but very much adds to the fall esthetic. Pro tip (not really - who am I kidding? I'm no interior designer): this stem looks incredible in a sea glass blue jug similar to this one ... Woven Plaid Throw Pillow with Exposed Zipper Brown/Cream - Threshold™ designed with Studio McGee – I'm really big on plaid right now, and I love how soft and subtle this plaid is. 18" Asymmetrical Faux Rusted Eucalyptus Wire Wreath - Hearth & Hand™ with Magnolia - when I say I checked the Target website daily for these suckers to come back in stock, that's zero exaggeration. The simplicity of this whole wire wreath trend is something I'm absolutely here for. I have two turn-of-the-century wood and glass pane doors on a slider in my family room. I got one for each, and I've never been more thrilled with a look. Lynwood Square Upholstered Cube - Threshold™ designed with Studio McGee - back to plaid! I've seen these two cubes used in a few different influencer's home photos, and they look great in a number of set ups. You can bet I'd have two for in front of my fireplace if Olivia didn't insist on eating macaroni and cheese with her hands, then wiping them everywhere... 'Go Get Em' 14.5oz Speckled Stoneware Mug Matte Sour Cream - Hearth & Hand™ with Magnolia - every good fall setup should include a candle (check), some cozy blankets and pillows (check), and a good hot beverage. Aside from this mug being A-DOR-A-BLE, the mantra printed on the side just felt fitting. Medium Glazed Ceramic Pumpkin Black - Threshold™ - I generally like to keep things light and bright, but these black pumpkins are too cool to pass up - and give some great depth to a mantel, shelf, entry table, or basket! Chunky Knit Throw Blanket - Threshold™ designed with Studio McGee - how cozy does this guy look? I'm a sucker for a throw blanket - especially a rust colored blanket. I mean, gotta stay on-brand, right?

I’m not a morning person. There, I said it. I never have been, I don’t know that I ever will be. When Logan and I made a pact to start waking up at 5 am each morning (yes, I yawn just thinking about it), I knew I’d have to put a plan in place that included some of my favorite practices (I’m a gal that appreciates a reward or five for diligence…). I will say, though, after a few months of dragging my you-know-what out of bed and tackling this checklist, I feel like a new woman. There’s something to be said for getting up early – and when I do, a few hours into my day, I’m so glad I did. Let’s hear it for feeling like you’ve conquered the day by 7 am, amiright?! I’ve included a download of my handy, dandy little morning checklist – but before I share it with you fine gals, I wanted to dive into each item a little more in-depth: DRINK A BIG ‘OLE GLASS OF WATER (GO AHEAD, ADD FROZEN FRUIT – TREAT-YO-SELF). I’ve always been more of a Diet Coke than a water girl (isn’t that horrible? Yeah…). That said, I recently started taking an elaborate mix of vitamins (all recommended by my holistic nutritionist, but more on that later – no skipping ahead!) and, for whatever reason (this may be totally in my head), I want NOTHING TO DO WITH DIET COKE. Praise. Be. I’ve been drinking much more water, and I’m such a fan. Don’t love water? Add frozen fruit. OR, I’m really loving Hint – give it a shot (watermelon is my favorite). SET INTENTIONS FOR YOUR DAY. Nope, the age-old “what are your intentions” question isn’t just for your parents to ask a significant other – now you get to ask it of yourself every morning! Intentions are not goals – they’re a bit more “of the moment,” where goals tend to map the future. Inc. published a great article about the importance of setting intentions – check it out! Intentions also have a more positive tone (so no, “I intend to drop kick my husband if he doesn’t take the trash out” won’t fly…) Finally, intentions are generally short and sweet. Keep it simple! Remember, these are today-type plans. Not long-term goals. What do intentions look like? Here are a few examples: I will give others the benefit of the doubt before jumping to conclusions I will be forgiving and understanding of myself and others I will lead with action, not with words I will be open to love – because I deserve it So set those intentions, sister! MEDITATE (Spoken in the most serene, angelic voice) “Breath in, breath out…” Meditation, while incredibly relaxing, can be a bit of a grind at first. I, for one, have a mind that never stops. And if you have a child, job or, you know – live and breath – I’m willing to bet you’re in the same boat! It’s hard to shut that mind off. Meditation is the practice of just that. Something I’ve found really helps – a mantra (which, is often interchangeable with an intention – ahem). Focusing on one, positive statement, and repeating it over and over in your head while you deep breath – you’ll be Yogi in no time! WRITE I can not impress upon you enough the power of a free-write. I’ve heard this called many things. My therapist calls it a brain dump. The book The Artist’s Way calls them morning pages. It can be about nothing, it can be about a current struggle, a triumph – anything, really. Sit down, set the timer for 30 minutes, and write. Can’t commit to 30 minutes? I get it. And honestly, it’s tough to spend 30 minutes writing right out the gate. It’s not uncommon to start writing, and at about minute nine, hit a mental block. That’s OKAY! Step away and try again tomorrow. Before you know it, you’ll have worked your way up to 30 minutes, and writing will become a tool to process and overcome or celebrate whatever is currently going on in your life! GET MOVING Yep, you heard me. Get moving! Do I LOVE working out? No. I don’t! But man do I chase the endorphin high that comes after… Working out is something I’ve only just started taking really seriously this year (I mean, we’ve all been in quarantine – what else is there to do?). I knew that if there ever was a time to start developing some new habits – especially when it comes to health and fitness – it was going to be the year I really couldn’t eat out, and had nowhere to go. I also set realistic expectations for myself. No more “I’d like to lose 40 lbs. three months.” That’s not even KIND OF realistic for me! Instead, I started setting small, measurable goals. Hell, at one point one of my goals was just to complete three workouts in a week. Here’s the thing: if you move, you will feel good – regardless of your weight. Knowing you’re doing what you can to take care of yourself is half the battle. Between the endorphins that come from hopping on that treadmill to the conscious “I just worked hard to do what’s best for my body” thought process, it will be a total game-changer. Can you work out later in the day? Sure. But let’s be honest – the later it gets, the easier it gets to talk yourself out of it. I’ve found that if I don’t work out first thing, a million other reasons I can’t work out later come up throughout the day, and I don’t work out… Not only that, but morning workouts make me feel I’ve started my day out right. SO, even if it’s just a morning walk – MOVE. GIVE THANKS It doesn’t take long, and we can all certainly think of five things we’re thankful for. They can be big – like a working vehicle, a job, a roof over your head… Or they can be small – a hug from a friend, a really good cup of coffee, a new shirt… Whatever it is you’re thankful for, write it down – x5 to be exact. Make a list of five things you’re thankful for each morning, and your mindset will be significantly better throughout the day, no matter what obstacles you face. Now, get out there and go get ’em! Need an easy way to hold yourself accountable? Download my free morning routine worksheet HERE and start giving back to yourself each and every morning!